My Wife Has Been Unfaithful - She Cheated on Me - Now What?
Actually, marriage is a framework for raising a family and in which to learn how not to be selfish.
I've written some articles and posts about the issue of unfaithful husbands. So I guess it's time to talk to men about the issue of unfaithful wives.
If you wish to contact me now, visit my Liveperson virtual office for info
So here's my response. First the short answer.
If you just found out, stay calm. Do not do anything rash. Go about your business, do your duty, go to work, be there for your kids. You've heard the old expression "stand back and count to ten." Well, stand back and maybe let a few weeks go by. As time passes the initial anger will diminish. Watch out for resentment. Let reason rule.
There is value in being able to talk it out. Most communities have government, nonprofit, church, or volunteer organizations focusing on men's issues, marriage or anger management. Avail yourself of any that are helpful. There are also resources available on the internet.
If it happened a few months or years ago, and it is still sticking in your craw, it means that you are still resentful. Watch out for resentment. Stand back and when you see it rising, observe it from the neutral zone and let it pass.
Now the longer answer.
Resentment ruins everything. But if you can let go of the resentment, you will be okay. Moreover, when the mind is clear and not clouded with resentment and bitterness, you will be able to see what is reasonable and wise to do. Remember, resentment robs us of joy and many other things.
I cannot overemphasize the importance of letting go of resentment.
Roland Trujillo, author, lecturer, marriage coach,
and author introduces his new comprehensive look at the delights, the challenges and the mysteries of marriage.
"The perfect book for troubled couples with different type of problems . . .
I can assure it will be one of the better books I have ever read." review of The Myths and Mysteries of Marriage
For over 20 years, Roland has been helping couples repair their relationships and move forward to optimal living.
Roland is now bringing his insights, based in compassion and spiritual principles, to a
new level in this unique look at the perils, pitfalls, and promises of relationships.
Why do we argue? How can I be more forgiving? Does divorce affect the kids? Can I save my marriage? My wife cheated on me-now what? My husband annoys me. Can we reconcile?
This long awaited book answers these questions and more. For years, listeners have thrilled to hear Roland on the radio. Now his advice for couples is crystallized in this unique look at relationships. Roland talks about the “how” of loving, forgiving, and reconciling. He will help you understand how resentment blocks love, and how to become unblocked.
"Listen to my 1 minute sound byte about my book The Myths and Mysteries of Marriage and about my special offer"
Roland even explains how the ancient story of Adam and Eve is still repeated in homes today. This book is for anyone interested in relationships, why they get in trouble, and how to repair them
The Myths and Mysteries of Marriage - making relationships work.
318 pages of insights and solutions
Written by Dr. Roland Trujillo Doctorate in Pastoral Psychology and based on 22 years of counseling and coaching couples
Here are just some of the topics discussed
The Dating and Mating Game Is Not a Game
“A Rose by Any Other Name is Still a Rose”
Why I Decided to Become a Pastor
Where to Find Real Solutions to your Relationship Woes
Why Couples Argue
Myths of Marriage
Sex in Marriage – The Shocking Truth
How to Forgive and Forget
How to Apologize and Clear the Air with Dignity
Just How Important is Dad?
Marriage Counseling for Men
Can I Reconcile with My Husband, Wife, or Child?
Is Food Your Secret Lover and Enabler?
Dealing with Hard Times
Adam and Eve: The First Dysfunctional Family
My Husband is Annoying
My Wife Asked Me to Move Out –What Should I
Advice to Divorced Moms
My Wife Cheated on Me – Now What?
Finding the Best Marriage Advice – Trust Your Instincts
The Strong Family—Ten Lessons in Faithfulness
Purchase at Amazon.com in quality paperback
Preview and purchase at Kindle! and download to your kindle or mobile device
"Hello everyone. These are two books that I think you should have on your shelf (or on your
computer, Android or Kindle).
The Myths and Mysteries of Marriage is my most popular book and it covers the basic important stuff like no other book.
Putting the Forever Back in Love is a follow up to The Myths and Mysteries of Marriage.
Putting the Forever Back in Love has advanced strategies. If you have been married for more than 10 years and your marriage is in trouble, this is the book you will want to read.
If you have kids and want to have some advanced insights and strategies for parenting, then Putting the Forever Back in Love is definitely going to be on your shipping list.
Now here is the good part!
Remember that I have a long standing offer. You can get any one of my ebooks sent to you by email as a token of my appreciation when you make a donation of any amount.
Many people don't know that I am a volunteer. I buy the airtime and internet time in order to be there to help people. Soooooo, any donation (yes, even a small donation like $2 is really appreciated by me).
So to take advantage of this offer, get a free eBook, and help keep this blog going--all at the same time--just click here and choose a book. then make a donation at safe and secure Paypal and you will get your gift eBook right away!!!
Why do couples argue?
How can we put the sparkle back in our marriage?
How can we communicate better?
What is the difference between courtship and casual dating?
My wife asked me to leave.
Why are men the way we are?
What does my wife want?
Can we reconcile?
My wife cheated on me – now what?
Based on over 20 years of counseling couples and answering questions on the radio. Roland tackles the tough questions with humor, discernment, and refreshing honesty. From the Garden of Eden to the 21st century, he’s got relationships covered.
"Roland, thank you so much for your book.
When I heard that you are a pastor, I hesitated to order it because I'm not into religion. But because I wanted to learn more about why I can't stop resenting my husband so much, I went ahead and got the book. I'm so glad that I did. The advice is very practical, and the book is filled with some beautiful spirituality too. I spent over a thousand dollars to register and fly to an out of town seminar I could have saved the thousand and got your book instead." Suzy - San Bernardino
It's like a relationships seminar in a box!
If you liked The Myths and Mysteries of Marriage you will love this book.
Been married for many years and have some issues? This is the book for you.
Based in 24 years of research and counseling, Dr. Trujillo presents new insights and strategies for healing relationships and resolving stress and unhappiness. Partners, parents, couples considering marriage, and adult children of dysfunctional families will find both practical and spiritual principles to help them move forward to happiness.
Want Putting the Forever Back in Love in paperback? Click here to see it at Amazon
Now in Kindle edition too!
Get a free eBook and help keep this blog going--all at the same time--just click here and choose a book. Then make a donation at safe and secure Paypal and you will get your gift eBook right away!!!
You'll benefit from Dr. Roland's 25 years of experience. Plus his books are a good read.
You'll also be saving up to 80% off retail price.
When you send a donation to help Roland, you are actually paying forward to help others. Roland volunteers his time to help others and he frequently gives materials away free to people who can't afford anything.
Roland Trujillo, MS, D. Pastoral Psychology, is the author of 17 books. He is host of a radio advice program that currently airs in Southern California and around the country for 25 years.
In his new 350 page book Putting the Forever Back in Love Roland reveals little known secrets to marriage success.